“By looking back, I can look forward…”

“By reflection, I can project…” — Henri Nouwen

Just last week, many of us were still enjoying Thanksgiving leftovers and settling into a slower weekend. And now, suddenly, we’re turning toward the next stretch of holidays—Hanukkah, Christmas, and New Year’s—coming quickly around the corner.

Before we rush ahead, this is a good moment to pause.  To reflect with compassion. To notice what last week’s holiday stirred up in your body, your energy, and your relationships.

Holidays can be joyful, tender, disruptive, overstimulating, grounding, or painful—and often a mix of all of the above. Changes in routine, shifting expectations, extra social time, financial pressure, and sensory overload can impact anyone. But for neurodiverse folks—ADHDers, autistic individuals, AuDHD humans, and those with sensitive or highly attuned nervous systems—these disruptions can be especially draining.

And when overwhelm hits, it’s easy to slip into self-blame:

 “I’m too much.”  “I’m not festive enough.”  “I should enjoy this more.”

You’re not alone—and none of those things are true. Your brain isn’t the problem. The environment and expectations often are.

So before the next round of holidays arrives, let’s gently look back at last week and let it teach us something supportive. Here are a few reflection questions to guide you:

• What part of the holiday felt the hardest—and what part felt supportive?

• When did your energy dip the most: before, during, or after the gathering?

• What was one moment when your body or brain said, “This is too much”?

• What small thing made the day easier for you (even if it felt minor at the time)?

You don’t need to answer all of these. Just notice what stands out.  Awareness gives us choices.

Looking Ahead: Three Areas to Gently Adjust

We’re not trying to overhaul your entire holiday season—just finding a few tweaks that help you feel more grounded and regulated. Let’s focus on three simple pillars:

1. Planning With Your Nervous System in Mind

Look at the commitments coming up and break them into smaller steps.Give yourself more time between events than you think you’ll need.Build in an exit plan—permission to leave early is real and valid.Your comfort matters.

2. Eating in a Way That Supports You

Keep nourishing foods accessible, even while enjoying seasonal treats.Bring a favorite food to gatherings so you know there’s something familiar.Keep water and snacks in your bag or car—future you will be grateful.

3. Moving Your Body (Gently and In Your Own Way)

A five-minute walk outside, a stretch in a quiet room, or a short dance break can release tension and help your nervous system reset.Movement doesn’t have to be big to be effective.

Above All… Value Connection in Ways That Feel Safe and Authentic

Some people you may only see once or twice a year. That doesn’t mean you need to perform, mask, or push past your limits. Set yourself up for success by tending to your body and brain before and after social events. Give yourself permission to show up as you are.

Want Support While You Put These Ideas Into Practice?

If you’d like a companion to walk alongside you—someone to help you plan, regulate, reflect, and show up differently this holiday season—I’d love to talk.  Reach out to set up a call, and we can explore how to make the coming weeks more manageable, grounded, and genuinely enjoyable.